I can’t tell you how many times I have seen couples fight about Valentine’s Day gifts. What you got, what you didn’t get, what you wanted, what was EXPECTED. And that is the problem right there. Between corporations looking to capitalize, and social pressures, we have come to have certain expectations for our valentines gifts. Allow me to explain…
Valentines day gossip gifts
You have lunch with your girlfriends. Its mid January. The conversation eventually gets around to everyone’s plans for Valentine’s Day. One pal mentions that her and her b/f are going down to Mexico for a week, all inclusive. Which is fine.
Then she casually throws in that it’s his gift to her. Suddenly, almost like a gust of wind, the tone changes. Now each girl at the table with a boyfriend is asking herself the same general thing:
“Why isn’t so-and-so doing something like that for me?” or “I wish so-and-so would do something like that for me…”
Even though logically, they know WHY it wouldn’t be happening. Whether its financial, time off work, or whatever, you know why you boyfriend might not be going that wild for valentines day. Mabye he just doesn’t believe in showing such a ridiculous amount of affection on one specific day and shows you love throughout the year. Either way, you still get that pang of jealousy.
Society is so concerned with status and what other people have, that when we don’t have the same things, we automatically feel pressured to strive for them. Which, in some ways is great. But not when it comes to love. You simply cannot compare your relationship to another one, it won’t work. There’s different situations, dynamics and emotions involved. The sooner you acknowledge and accept this, the healthier your relationship will get.
Valentines day gifts healthy relationship
The only person you have to make happy in a relationship is your partner. When you are planning a gift for them, there’s really only two things to consider:
What THEY want. Yeah you may end up on a weekend getaway that you would not necessarily choose for yourself. But you love you significant other, and really, the holiday isn’t about what you are doing, it’s who you are doing it with. Also, don’t buy them something you would want, or, if you live together, something ‘householdy.’ That’s a trip straight to the doghouse.
Valentines day gifts food and wine
Income/Finances. Ok, so you you know you and your partner would love to go to that food and wine festival 5 hours away. But can your finances take the hit? Especially if the trip involves taking time off work. Could you even afford to take a day off, depending on what the gift was? Consider your income when choosing a gift, don’t put yourself in the poorhouse trying to impress them. You already have them, and if they truly love you, they’ll realize that its the thought that counts.
As a gift receiver, be aware of these things as well, and accept them. As long as your partner puts effort and thought into your gift, that’s all that is important. Keep in mind too that you and your friends may move in different income brackets, so comparison of gifts is a really horrible idea.
At the end of the day, don’t let societal pressures make you feel like you and your sweetheart don’t have good enough Valentine’s plans. No one knows the true story of your relationship but YOU, and as long as you to keep each other happy, one single gift on a corporate cash grab of a holiday won’t change a thing.
