The Notebook (2004)
The thought of love conquering all is one that we all dream of. The Notebook certainly lives up to that notion as Noah and Allie deal with meddling parents, a war, engagement, and finally Alzheimer’s to make us feel all warm and fuzzy inside in the end.
Love Actually(2003)
Love Actually not only has an awesome cast, but it manages to intertwine a half dozen different plotlines effortlessly. The way it portrays several different styles of relationships, and how they manage to click together is what wins me over.
Sweet Home Alabama (2002)
Sweet Home Alabama has Reese Witherspoon as a former small town girl turned fashion designer, who gets engaged to a swanky rich dude and must now obtain that divorce she so conveniently hadn’t gotten until now. It also shows us that sometimes, you just don’t get over your first love.
Amelie (2001)
French Amelie is one of the original films to showcase the ‘quirky girl’ getting the guy. It is beautifully styled and whimsical, and is one of my all-time favorite movies, period.
10 Things I Hate About You (1999)
A modern day retelling of the Taming of the Shrew, it mixes comedy and romance well. It was also Heath Ledger’s breakout role, and made teen girls simultaneously swoon and green with envy at Julia Stiles’ character Kat.
The Wedding Singer (1998)
What better way to please everyone than by combining romance with comedy and a kickin’ 80's soundtrack? Watch Sandler at his best as the unfortunate wedding singer, and Drew Barrymore as his co-worker/love interest with a douche of a fiance.
Say Anything… (1989)
Oh, John Cusack. You raised the bar for men in the romance department to epic proportions in this movie as Lloyd, the adorable boyfriend of valedictorian Diane. After a rocky period, Lloyd wins Dianes heart and flies with her to Europe for her fellowship. Now that’s love.
Pretty in Pink (1986)
Pretty in Pink is the movie that taught us that you don’t need to be in the same social circle to find someone to love. Andie and Blane are from way opposite social circles in their local high school, but manage to feel the attraction and in the end, realize that despite their differences, they believe in each other and their love.
Doctor Zhivago (1965)
Doctor Zhivago is a bittersweet romance about people kept apart by unfortunate circumstances that are beyond their control. It occurs during the Russian Revolution, and tells the tale of Yuri and Lara. The reason why I feel this movie is so successful is that, while their romance is endearing, it isn’t so much the main focus of the movie.
So everyone, if you are in the mood for a good night in with your significant other, I’d suggest grabbing a few of these and making the most of it!
Monday, 27 June 2016
Monday, 30 May 2016
Lachido Pros and Cons of Dating a Foreigner
When it comes to dating, we all have types that make us go boy crazy. Some of us like dating men in uniform, bartenders, suits or construction however most of us have fallen hard for a sexy foreigner.
I can’t think of anything sexier than a cute accent. You can never get enough. Although dating a foreigner who is visiting your country or vice versa may seem appealing, there are some factors that are also not as attractive as their beautiful accents.
If you’re thinking of dating a foreigner, here are some pro and con dating tips you should consider beforehand:
PRO: He Hasn’t Been With Your Friends Before.
You can pretty much guarantee your foreign hottie hasn’t slept with one of your friends or vice versa. Which is nice, especially if you live in the same city you grew up in, where everyone seems to know everyone. So meeting someone who isn’t a mutual friend on Facebook, let alone someone hasn’t slept with at least one of your friends is refreshing to say at the very least.
Con: Expiration Dating
Unless your foreign lover has a VISA, it should be understood that this relationship would be a fleeting one. When you dating someone and know there’s an expiration date to your romance off the bat, it’s very difficult of having anything long-term and meaningful develop. So unless you’re looking for an affair to remember, don’t get too attached.
Pro: They Can Help You Fall Back In Love With Your City
When you’ve been living in the same city for a while, you can get pretty bored and ignore the beauty and culture that surrounds you. But when you’re taking a sexy tourist around town to check out the sights and attractions, you get to rediscover your home base through their awe-struck and beautiful eyes.
Con: They Can Distract You
Since the point of traveling is to experience new things, their goals are being met. But yours may be falling by the wayside. So although it’s fun to eat foreign home made cooking and make love until dawn every night, don’t let your new lover distract you from your everyday responsibilities and long-term accomplishments.
Pro: Don’t Have To Worry About Awkward Bump-ins After The Breakup
We all know that the most difficult thing about breaking up is running into your ex after you call it quits. However, if your ex lives on the other side of the world, you don’t have to worry about bumping into them other than on your newsfeed for your social media networks.
Con: Won’t Be Able To Get Back Together
When it’s over, it’s really over. Life is not a Lifetime TV movie after all. So if you hit a bump along the way on your new relationship, then you can kiss your lover goodbye. After all, once he/she boards that plane back home, there’s really no point in talking things out or seeking couple’s therapy. It’s over. No break up sex and no closure.
Pro/con: Zero Background Info
It’s hard to get a reference check on someone from another part of the world. So their past is a mystery — but then again, so is yours!
If you’re going to date while visiting or on your travels remember these tips as a guide to help you make the right decisions. Remember, this type of dating should be fun and enjoyed by both people. So, keep it simple and have lots of fun and lots of sex.
I can’t think of anything sexier than a cute accent. You can never get enough. Although dating a foreigner who is visiting your country or vice versa may seem appealing, there are some factors that are also not as attractive as their beautiful accents.
If you’re thinking of dating a foreigner, here are some pro and con dating tips you should consider beforehand:
PRO: He Hasn’t Been With Your Friends Before.
You can pretty much guarantee your foreign hottie hasn’t slept with one of your friends or vice versa. Which is nice, especially if you live in the same city you grew up in, where everyone seems to know everyone. So meeting someone who isn’t a mutual friend on Facebook, let alone someone hasn’t slept with at least one of your friends is refreshing to say at the very least.
Con: Expiration Dating
Unless your foreign lover has a VISA, it should be understood that this relationship would be a fleeting one. When you dating someone and know there’s an expiration date to your romance off the bat, it’s very difficult of having anything long-term and meaningful develop. So unless you’re looking for an affair to remember, don’t get too attached.
Pro: They Can Help You Fall Back In Love With Your City
When you’ve been living in the same city for a while, you can get pretty bored and ignore the beauty and culture that surrounds you. But when you’re taking a sexy tourist around town to check out the sights and attractions, you get to rediscover your home base through their awe-struck and beautiful eyes.
Con: They Can Distract You
Since the point of traveling is to experience new things, their goals are being met. But yours may be falling by the wayside. So although it’s fun to eat foreign home made cooking and make love until dawn every night, don’t let your new lover distract you from your everyday responsibilities and long-term accomplishments.
Pro: Don’t Have To Worry About Awkward Bump-ins After The Breakup
We all know that the most difficult thing about breaking up is running into your ex after you call it quits. However, if your ex lives on the other side of the world, you don’t have to worry about bumping into them other than on your newsfeed for your social media networks.
Con: Won’t Be Able To Get Back Together
When it’s over, it’s really over. Life is not a Lifetime TV movie after all. So if you hit a bump along the way on your new relationship, then you can kiss your lover goodbye. After all, once he/she boards that plane back home, there’s really no point in talking things out or seeking couple’s therapy. It’s over. No break up sex and no closure.
Pro/con: Zero Background Info
It’s hard to get a reference check on someone from another part of the world. So their past is a mystery — but then again, so is yours!
If you’re going to date while visiting or on your travels remember these tips as a guide to help you make the right decisions. Remember, this type of dating should be fun and enjoyed by both people. So, keep it simple and have lots of fun and lots of sex.
Friday, 29 April 2016
Lachido How Can You Make Him Notice You
How Can You Make Him Notice You
I’ve encountered a lot of girls who say they have trouble getting the man they’re lusting after to take interest.
I’ve decided I’d give some dating advice on how to make him notice you so you can rest your brains for a while and just focus on what matters.
Follow my rules and you’ll have him in the palm of you hand.
Wear your hair, in the right way! Even women turn their heads when they see a great head of hair.
Guys love good hair, take the time and do it right. Invest in products that will make you stand out.
Get a good stylist to show you how to do you your hair the right way, everyday.
Wear clothes that will get you notice, however make them appropriate.
I’m not saying dress like a slut, but dress with flare and sense of style.
Looks refined, looked fresh and you’ll get him looking, without doubt.
Speak with confidence. Despite what you might have been told, men love smart women.
Choose suitable words and be confidently in your delivery. Use the correct pronunciation. A great way to how him that you’re intelligent is though your words.
Find the right fragrance, not every scent is right for every person.
Find the scent that makes you smell great. It’s all about chemistry. Match your body with the scent that makes you stand out.
Listen up ladies this is a big one. You have to walk like you’re in your own runway show.
Your gait will get him to notice you, strut it! Walk with poise and confidence.
Put those shoulders back, stand up straight and walk it out.
You should have the attitude of knowing when you walk into a room or though a crowd everyone, especially him will be looking at you.
Find out what his interest are. Is he into any sports like cricket, football or rugby? Does he like to read or go to the gym?
Find out exactly what he likes to do and make yourself interested in those things.
This will give you something to talk to him and about and he will truly notice you.
When you have things in common you’re all set to make you move and ask him out on a date.
Yes, I said you ask him out on a date. Its time for you take change of your own destiny.
Show you’re confident and show him you can put yourself out there and make the date happen.
Take the pressure of him and he will definitely notice you for that.
Now that you have this tips on how to get him to notice you, put them to the test.
Great hair, great clothes and a great attitude are what you need to get him to notice you.
Once he has you in his sights the rest will be a piece of cake. Hey, it is possible to have your cake and eat it too.
I’ve encountered a lot of girls who say they have trouble getting the man they’re lusting after to take interest.
I’ve decided I’d give some dating advice on how to make him notice you so you can rest your brains for a while and just focus on what matters.
Follow my rules and you’ll have him in the palm of you hand.
Wear your hair, in the right way! Even women turn their heads when they see a great head of hair.
Guys love good hair, take the time and do it right. Invest in products that will make you stand out.
Get a good stylist to show you how to do you your hair the right way, everyday.
Wear clothes that will get you notice, however make them appropriate.
I’m not saying dress like a slut, but dress with flare and sense of style.
Looks refined, looked fresh and you’ll get him looking, without doubt.
Speak with confidence. Despite what you might have been told, men love smart women.
Choose suitable words and be confidently in your delivery. Use the correct pronunciation. A great way to how him that you’re intelligent is though your words.
Find the right fragrance, not every scent is right for every person.
Find the scent that makes you smell great. It’s all about chemistry. Match your body with the scent that makes you stand out.
Listen up ladies this is a big one. You have to walk like you’re in your own runway show.
Your gait will get him to notice you, strut it! Walk with poise and confidence.
Put those shoulders back, stand up straight and walk it out.
You should have the attitude of knowing when you walk into a room or though a crowd everyone, especially him will be looking at you.
Find out what his interest are. Is he into any sports like cricket, football or rugby? Does he like to read or go to the gym?
Find out exactly what he likes to do and make yourself interested in those things.
This will give you something to talk to him and about and he will truly notice you.
When you have things in common you’re all set to make you move and ask him out on a date.
Yes, I said you ask him out on a date. Its time for you take change of your own destiny.
Show you’re confident and show him you can put yourself out there and make the date happen.
Take the pressure of him and he will definitely notice you for that.
Now that you have this tips on how to get him to notice you, put them to the test.
Great hair, great clothes and a great attitude are what you need to get him to notice you.
Once he has you in his sights the rest will be a piece of cake. Hey, it is possible to have your cake and eat it too.
Wednesday, 30 March 2016
Lachido Moving In Together
MOVING IN TOGETHER: IS THERE ROOM FOR 2?
When you find love and decide to move in together, it seems like a great idea. You’re taking a big step in your relationship and you’re getting everything you wanted. But, are you?
Its bedtime and you’re used to sprawling out to get comfy. However, you know have someone else in the bed with you and you’re fighting for space that used to be occupied to you. You thought, you would be cuddling every night.
Its dinnertime and you’re hungry for pizza. You failed to remember that your better half could consume a whole pizza in minutes. You’re now going to the refrigerator to find some leftovers from two nights ago.
Moving in with someone is a big step for every relationship. This is when you start to share you resources. That chip dip that would last you 4 nights is gone in one sitting and the loaf of bread that seemed to last forever is gone within a week.
You have to learn the real meaning of sharing. It’s difficult to wrap your head around the idea of sharing everything with this other person, albeit you’re in love with them. Sometimes, that pizza is just your pizza and sharing you morning coffee seems like a giant feat. You have to remember, you’ve made it! You’re living with your lover and your best friend. But, sharing the space is hard.
I bet you didn’t realize how much space you actually hard before they moved in, right? Right now, it seems like their hogging all the space, there is room for you anymore. The alarm clock goes off at 6am, its time for your morning run. However, they won’t take up until 7:30am, hitting the snooze button and accidentally waking them up twice before 7:30am seems like the end of the world. What a great way to start off the morning, with a cranky partner. Remember, you’re in love and you have a lot of things other people only dream of having. To smooth things over, when you get back from your run make breakfast for their wake up time. Everything will be ok, this moving in thing, is a great thing.
It seems one person needs everything and the other nothing. Someone will walk into a store and the “I need, I need” kicks in. You know, you go into a shop to get some mouthwash and you leave with £150 worth of merchandise. While they never spend money on anything, maybe an odd lunch here and there. It makes you feel like you’re doing something wrong. You’re not, it’s just the way people are, spenders and keepers. Maybe each of your can learn a few things from each other. Its ok to spend, but don’t over or under spend. You’re in a relationship now; start saving for a trip together.
Moving in is a step that every relationship needs to take. Its rarely every easy and you’ll learn new things about each other. You just have to remember, you’re in love, you’re happy. It will take time to get used to this new situation, but that is the same for everything. You can do it, you can make it work.
When you find love and decide to move in together, it seems like a great idea. You’re taking a big step in your relationship and you’re getting everything you wanted. But, are you?
Its bedtime and you’re used to sprawling out to get comfy. However, you know have someone else in the bed with you and you’re fighting for space that used to be occupied to you. You thought, you would be cuddling every night.
Its dinnertime and you’re hungry for pizza. You failed to remember that your better half could consume a whole pizza in minutes. You’re now going to the refrigerator to find some leftovers from two nights ago.
Moving in with someone is a big step for every relationship. This is when you start to share you resources. That chip dip that would last you 4 nights is gone in one sitting and the loaf of bread that seemed to last forever is gone within a week.
You have to learn the real meaning of sharing. It’s difficult to wrap your head around the idea of sharing everything with this other person, albeit you’re in love with them. Sometimes, that pizza is just your pizza and sharing you morning coffee seems like a giant feat. You have to remember, you’ve made it! You’re living with your lover and your best friend. But, sharing the space is hard.
I bet you didn’t realize how much space you actually hard before they moved in, right? Right now, it seems like their hogging all the space, there is room for you anymore. The alarm clock goes off at 6am, its time for your morning run. However, they won’t take up until 7:30am, hitting the snooze button and accidentally waking them up twice before 7:30am seems like the end of the world. What a great way to start off the morning, with a cranky partner. Remember, you’re in love and you have a lot of things other people only dream of having. To smooth things over, when you get back from your run make breakfast for their wake up time. Everything will be ok, this moving in thing, is a great thing.
It seems one person needs everything and the other nothing. Someone will walk into a store and the “I need, I need” kicks in. You know, you go into a shop to get some mouthwash and you leave with £150 worth of merchandise. While they never spend money on anything, maybe an odd lunch here and there. It makes you feel like you’re doing something wrong. You’re not, it’s just the way people are, spenders and keepers. Maybe each of your can learn a few things from each other. Its ok to spend, but don’t over or under spend. You’re in a relationship now; start saving for a trip together.
Moving in is a step that every relationship needs to take. Its rarely every easy and you’ll learn new things about each other. You just have to remember, you’re in love, you’re happy. It will take time to get used to this new situation, but that is the same for everything. You can do it, you can make it work.
Monday, 29 February 2016
Lachido Reduce Your Chance Of Being Cheated
Why People Cheat: Reduce Your Chance Of Being Cheated On.
Both men and women are guilty of infidelity, but why? This article will take a look at why people cheat. Find out what you can do to stop your relationship from ending because someone isn’t happy.
What are the main reasons people cheat? Studies have shown that when people cheat they’re usually feeling disconnected to their partner. Cheating happens on every level, from new relationship to serious relationship. People report that they felt their partners under appreciated them; this is the foundation of cheating. However, this isn’t to rule out that sex isn’t part of the problem; you need to be emotionally and physically fulfilled to have a healthy relationship.
Often it’s suggested that people are cheating because they’re not attracted to their partner. However, studies show that cheaters don’t describe their partner’s counterparts as being more attractive. Therefore, its most likely an emotional disconnects.
People cheat because they want to feel wanted. People want to affirmation they’re still attractive, because they’re feeling insecure. When someone is feeling insecure they will seek comfort from a person that makes them feel better about themselves.
Usually affairs stem from the office. If someone is looking for attention, it will come from a coworker. A coworker who sees you as smart, power and gives you respect. More times than not, they start off as innocent flirting and turn into something physical.
Outside influences can be a catalyst for cheating. Being around single friends who are having fun, sleeping around maybe cause feelings that it’s what you should be doing as well. Cheating isn’t fun. It hurtful and it can cause everyone involved serious and long-term emotional grief.
The follow are tips on show you can reduce the chances of getting cheated on.
Reduce Your Chance Of Being Cheated On Tip 1: Be aware of your relationship at all times. Relationships are not easy; you have to work at them. Don’t get so comfortable that you lose the identity of your relationship, remember why you fell in love, in the first place. Keep doing the things that made the relationship work, getting dressed up; playing around, having date nights to remind each other what you have is important.
Don’t forget that being in a relationship doesn’t mean you can let yourself go. Keep in shape and keep a healthy positive demeanor.
Reduce Your Chance Of Being Cheated On Tip 2: Communication is one of the biggest factors in creating a successful relationship. If you feel that something has changed its best to address the situation. Talk to your partner and find out what’s happening. Having great communication is the key to saving your relationship.
Reduce Your Chance Of Being Cheated On Tip 3: Keep in mind that every great relationship had 2 keys for success, an emotional and a physically connection. You can’t read each other’s minds, so talk about what you’re feeling. Keep the relationship fresh by spicing things up in the bedroom or going on a trip. Don’t let your relationship get stale. Never go too long without having sex with your partner, make sure, you make them feel wanted. You need to put the effort in to get the good results you want.
It’s hard to really pinpoint why people do anything. However, if you follow these tips you should create a more healthy and dynamic relationship that will keep both parties happy and both parties in the same bed.
Both men and women are guilty of infidelity, but why? This article will take a look at why people cheat. Find out what you can do to stop your relationship from ending because someone isn’t happy.
What are the main reasons people cheat? Studies have shown that when people cheat they’re usually feeling disconnected to their partner. Cheating happens on every level, from new relationship to serious relationship. People report that they felt their partners under appreciated them; this is the foundation of cheating. However, this isn’t to rule out that sex isn’t part of the problem; you need to be emotionally and physically fulfilled to have a healthy relationship.
Often it’s suggested that people are cheating because they’re not attracted to their partner. However, studies show that cheaters don’t describe their partner’s counterparts as being more attractive. Therefore, its most likely an emotional disconnects.
People cheat because they want to feel wanted. People want to affirmation they’re still attractive, because they’re feeling insecure. When someone is feeling insecure they will seek comfort from a person that makes them feel better about themselves.
Usually affairs stem from the office. If someone is looking for attention, it will come from a coworker. A coworker who sees you as smart, power and gives you respect. More times than not, they start off as innocent flirting and turn into something physical.
Outside influences can be a catalyst for cheating. Being around single friends who are having fun, sleeping around maybe cause feelings that it’s what you should be doing as well. Cheating isn’t fun. It hurtful and it can cause everyone involved serious and long-term emotional grief.
The follow are tips on show you can reduce the chances of getting cheated on.
Reduce Your Chance Of Being Cheated On Tip 1: Be aware of your relationship at all times. Relationships are not easy; you have to work at them. Don’t get so comfortable that you lose the identity of your relationship, remember why you fell in love, in the first place. Keep doing the things that made the relationship work, getting dressed up; playing around, having date nights to remind each other what you have is important.
Don’t forget that being in a relationship doesn’t mean you can let yourself go. Keep in shape and keep a healthy positive demeanor.
Reduce Your Chance Of Being Cheated On Tip 2: Communication is one of the biggest factors in creating a successful relationship. If you feel that something has changed its best to address the situation. Talk to your partner and find out what’s happening. Having great communication is the key to saving your relationship.
Reduce Your Chance Of Being Cheated On Tip 3: Keep in mind that every great relationship had 2 keys for success, an emotional and a physically connection. You can’t read each other’s minds, so talk about what you’re feeling. Keep the relationship fresh by spicing things up in the bedroom or going on a trip. Don’t let your relationship get stale. Never go too long without having sex with your partner, make sure, you make them feel wanted. You need to put the effort in to get the good results you want.
It’s hard to really pinpoint why people do anything. However, if you follow these tips you should create a more healthy and dynamic relationship that will keep both parties happy and both parties in the same bed.
Wednesday, 27 January 2016
Lachido Jealous Lover
Jealous Lover
We all know that since it’s close to St. Patrick’s Day, everybody is seeing green. However, there are some people seeing green that it is not in their emerald green beers, but rather they are seeing green because they can not tame the green-eyed monster from rearing its ugly face in their dating lives.
Sure, jealousy is a natural emotion we all face from time to time. However, it’s how you choose to react to those insecure and envious feelings that can undermine and destroy a once stable relationship.
For those that need a reality check or for those looking for types of people to avoid, here is our online relationship guide to spotting the four types of jealous behavior green-eyed monster exhibit:
The Territorial Urinating Lover
Have you ever said hello to someone at a party and before you know it, their partner is on the scene practically lifting their legs and marking their territory and claim on their significant others like they were dogs? For people like this, I suggest that they take a deep breath and relax already! It’s perfectly acceptable for people to make small talk at parties and other social functions. It doesn’t mean your boyfriend/girlfriend is going to fall for the partygoer who shares the same love for pigs in a blanket as they do, so chill out! Feel free to mingle with other guests and give your significant lover some peace because after all, remember you are both individuals.
The Friend Blocking Significant Other
We all have friends who are joined at the hip to the significant others. These are the kind of people that are gigantic pushovers when their significant calls or texts every 10 minutes or so when they’re out with their friends. To end this quickly, always turn off your phone for at least 30 minutes to make a statement. When asked why your phone was off, you might have to address to your partner that they may have chronic separation anxiety and if that’s the case, it may be best to address this in a professional setting.
The Jealous Drama Queen or King
When you act out your envy in public, you’re humiliating yourself and you are especially humiliating your significant other. (Especially if you’re drunk!) So if you are one those types that have to let everyone know your private business and you feel the urge to shout, swear and throw your drink, then count to ten, take a deep a breath and sober up. Leave the kind of drama to the reality stars that the rest of the world mocks.
The Envious Downer
This occurs when somebody has too much pride or too big of an ego to admit that they are jealous. Instead, they rather ruin everybody’s good time with their negative feelings and energy. You never want to be that person and no one wants to be around THAT person. If you feel like you wear all of your emotions on your face and in the tone of your voice, politely excuse yourself and sleep on it. The next day, just apologize and admit why you were “down.”
We all know that since it’s close to St. Patrick’s Day, everybody is seeing green. However, there are some people seeing green that it is not in their emerald green beers, but rather they are seeing green because they can not tame the green-eyed monster from rearing its ugly face in their dating lives.
Sure, jealousy is a natural emotion we all face from time to time. However, it’s how you choose to react to those insecure and envious feelings that can undermine and destroy a once stable relationship.
For those that need a reality check or for those looking for types of people to avoid, here is our online relationship guide to spotting the four types of jealous behavior green-eyed monster exhibit:
The Territorial Urinating Lover
Have you ever said hello to someone at a party and before you know it, their partner is on the scene practically lifting their legs and marking their territory and claim on their significant others like they were dogs? For people like this, I suggest that they take a deep breath and relax already! It’s perfectly acceptable for people to make small talk at parties and other social functions. It doesn’t mean your boyfriend/girlfriend is going to fall for the partygoer who shares the same love for pigs in a blanket as they do, so chill out! Feel free to mingle with other guests and give your significant lover some peace because after all, remember you are both individuals.
The Friend Blocking Significant Other
We all have friends who are joined at the hip to the significant others. These are the kind of people that are gigantic pushovers when their significant calls or texts every 10 minutes or so when they’re out with their friends. To end this quickly, always turn off your phone for at least 30 minutes to make a statement. When asked why your phone was off, you might have to address to your partner that they may have chronic separation anxiety and if that’s the case, it may be best to address this in a professional setting.
The Jealous Drama Queen or King
When you act out your envy in public, you’re humiliating yourself and you are especially humiliating your significant other. (Especially if you’re drunk!) So if you are one those types that have to let everyone know your private business and you feel the urge to shout, swear and throw your drink, then count to ten, take a deep a breath and sober up. Leave the kind of drama to the reality stars that the rest of the world mocks.
The Envious Downer
This occurs when somebody has too much pride or too big of an ego to admit that they are jealous. Instead, they rather ruin everybody’s good time with their negative feelings and energy. You never want to be that person and no one wants to be around THAT person. If you feel like you wear all of your emotions on your face and in the tone of your voice, politely excuse yourself and sleep on it. The next day, just apologize and admit why you were “down.”
Tuesday, 29 December 2015
Lachido The Perks Of Being A Cougar
Less than a decade ago, Demi Moore made cougar dating popular and many older women took dating tips on how to snag a younger fella simply because she made it trendy. Now while seeing Demi Moore admitted into rehab and turning into a sad woman, there is unfortunately now a negative connotation incorporated into the word “cougar” . However, it’s important to note that Demi had the right idea–she just didn’t have the right young man.
It’s also important to note that Ms. Moore was a puma–not a cougar. A puma is a woman who dates someone 10 to 15 years younger than she is (which hardly ever has a great success rate) and cougars are women who date someone 5 to 10 years younger.
Nowadays, many women are dating men 5 to 10 years younger than them because many of those same single ladies have had their hearts continuously broken by men of the same age or older.
So if you’re flirting with the idea of dating a younger man, here are some great perks of being a cougar:
Dating Perk # 1: You Actually Get To Grow Old Together!
It may seem strange that I’m starting off my love advice list with a mortality angle, but it’s a noted fact that women do tend to outlive men by several years–which is strange considering there are so many older men dating younger women. If you’re looking to find love with a life-long partner, then being a cougar benefits you because you actually will get to grow old together.
Dating Perk # 2: Younger Men Who Date Older Women Are More Secure
If a younger man is attracted to a sophisticated older woman, it’s a great sign that he’s a progressive thinker who is very secure in his manhood. Think about it: He doesn’t need a younger trophy wife or girlfriend to stroke his male ego, because he’s more intrigued by the challenge of an older woman.
Dating Perk # 3: No Excess Baggage
Unless your young lover has a psycho ex-girlfriend, younger men generally tend to have less baggage than older men. Younger men generally don’t have alimony to pay off or have to pay off child benefits each month. Because they don’t have enormous debt, they are generally more happy than older men–which is great for you!
Dating Perk # 4: Less Risk Of Dating An Eternal Bachelor
If a man has never been able to sustain or even be in a live-in relationship by the time he’s 40, there is a pretty high chance that he will never be able to commit to a woman due to the fact that he is too stubborn and set in his ways to truly share his life with anyone besides himself. However, men in their late 20s or early 30s are more open to being in a long-term relationship if they find themselves smitten with you.
It’s also important to note that Ms. Moore was a puma–not a cougar. A puma is a woman who dates someone 10 to 15 years younger than she is (which hardly ever has a great success rate) and cougars are women who date someone 5 to 10 years younger.
Nowadays, many women are dating men 5 to 10 years younger than them because many of those same single ladies have had their hearts continuously broken by men of the same age or older.
So if you’re flirting with the idea of dating a younger man, here are some great perks of being a cougar:
Dating Perk # 1: You Actually Get To Grow Old Together!
It may seem strange that I’m starting off my love advice list with a mortality angle, but it’s a noted fact that women do tend to outlive men by several years–which is strange considering there are so many older men dating younger women. If you’re looking to find love with a life-long partner, then being a cougar benefits you because you actually will get to grow old together.
Dating Perk # 2: Younger Men Who Date Older Women Are More Secure
If a younger man is attracted to a sophisticated older woman, it’s a great sign that he’s a progressive thinker who is very secure in his manhood. Think about it: He doesn’t need a younger trophy wife or girlfriend to stroke his male ego, because he’s more intrigued by the challenge of an older woman.
Dating Perk # 3: No Excess Baggage
Unless your young lover has a psycho ex-girlfriend, younger men generally tend to have less baggage than older men. Younger men generally don’t have alimony to pay off or have to pay off child benefits each month. Because they don’t have enormous debt, they are generally more happy than older men–which is great for you!
Dating Perk # 4: Less Risk Of Dating An Eternal Bachelor
If a man has never been able to sustain or even be in a live-in relationship by the time he’s 40, there is a pretty high chance that he will never be able to commit to a woman due to the fact that he is too stubborn and set in his ways to truly share his life with anyone besides himself. However, men in their late 20s or early 30s are more open to being in a long-term relationship if they find themselves smitten with you.
Friday, 27 November 2015
Lachido Find Love
Find Love - Love and Depression
When we get into a new relationship with someone, we often showcase our happiest and entertaining selves to our significant others and that’s because we truly are happy with our new dating prospects and the incredible sex we are having with the object of our affections. However, if you struggle with anxiety, depression or any other common mental disorder, it can be extremely difficult to maintain a healthy relationship with someone we love.
If you are battling depression or anxiety, here are some key dating tips and love advice you should take when you are in a relationship:
Only Reveal Your Disorder To Your Partner In A Safe And Comfortable Environment
One of the most daunting things a person who suffers from depression can experience is admitting their flaws to their partners. If you sense that opening up about your prescriptions or your group therapy sessions, then steer clear of any serious conversations until you are serious with your significant other. If you are confident that they will not judge you from your vulnerabilities, then you should talk to them in a safe and comfortable environment such as your home. If they see it as a red flag, then it will save you much heartache down the road.
Keep It To Yourself At Least For The First Date
No matter how accepting your date is, if you start blabbing about taking meds before your appetizers arrive, then chances are that they will immediately be turned off from you. On the first date, you should just relax as much as you possibly can and let that person get to know the best side of you–because if they really like you, they won’t care about the future challenges that will come further down the line.
Always Admit Your Problems Before Moving In Together
If you suffer from a form of depression that makes you sabotage all your relationships, it’s only fair that your significant other knows about this before moving in together. He or she should always be aware of the therapy sessions you take and the prescriptions that you are on. They need to know about the side effects and mood swings beforehand in case they think they’re the ones responsible for your depression.
Reveal Details After Fights
It’s always best to give your lover a heads up after a fight that they weren’t responsible for. You should let your partner know about how you get when you break down for seemingly no reason at all. They should about your sudden mood changes and how they can support you when you are experiencing these negative emotions. By sharing this information with your partner, they will be able to help you when you need it and won’t get shocked when you have a meltdown.
When we get into a new relationship with someone, we often showcase our happiest and entertaining selves to our significant others and that’s because we truly are happy with our new dating prospects and the incredible sex we are having with the object of our affections. However, if you struggle with anxiety, depression or any other common mental disorder, it can be extremely difficult to maintain a healthy relationship with someone we love.
If you are battling depression or anxiety, here are some key dating tips and love advice you should take when you are in a relationship:
Only Reveal Your Disorder To Your Partner In A Safe And Comfortable Environment
One of the most daunting things a person who suffers from depression can experience is admitting their flaws to their partners. If you sense that opening up about your prescriptions or your group therapy sessions, then steer clear of any serious conversations until you are serious with your significant other. If you are confident that they will not judge you from your vulnerabilities, then you should talk to them in a safe and comfortable environment such as your home. If they see it as a red flag, then it will save you much heartache down the road.
Keep It To Yourself At Least For The First Date
No matter how accepting your date is, if you start blabbing about taking meds before your appetizers arrive, then chances are that they will immediately be turned off from you. On the first date, you should just relax as much as you possibly can and let that person get to know the best side of you–because if they really like you, they won’t care about the future challenges that will come further down the line.
Always Admit Your Problems Before Moving In Together
If you suffer from a form of depression that makes you sabotage all your relationships, it’s only fair that your significant other knows about this before moving in together. He or she should always be aware of the therapy sessions you take and the prescriptions that you are on. They need to know about the side effects and mood swings beforehand in case they think they’re the ones responsible for your depression.
Reveal Details After Fights
It’s always best to give your lover a heads up after a fight that they weren’t responsible for. You should let your partner know about how you get when you break down for seemingly no reason at all. They should about your sudden mood changes and how they can support you when you are experiencing these negative emotions. By sharing this information with your partner, they will be able to help you when you need it and won’t get shocked when you have a meltdown.
Friday, 30 October 2015
Lachido Common Dating Myths Debunked
To our great detriment, many single ladies are prone to making cold judgements about good people before we even give them a proper chance when it comes to our relationships. And for this, I blame outdated old wives’ tales and stereotypes. In order to have the true dating experience we all crave for, we must shed some light on some common dating myths and why we shouldn’t be living by them.
Dating Myth #1: Owning More Than One Cat Does Not Mean You Will Die An Old Maid
When we hear some woman has more than one cat, what is the first phrase that generally pops into your heads? “Crazy cat lady” would have been what I would have thought. Sure, there are crazy women that own cats for some reason, however it’s ridiculous to compare mental illness and celibacy with owning multiple cats.
Dating Myth # 2: Women Who Love Sweatpants Need Professional Help
The baggy sweatpants have gotten a bad reputation as of late. Almost every depression commercial depicts the sweatpants as a sure fire sign of mental instability. However, I beg to differ. Just because a woman wants to put on her most comfortable and over-sized sweatpants, does not means he needs to be quarantined and sedated. So behalf of all the sweatpant-wearing lounging single ladies out there, I salute you!
Dating Myth # 3: Poor Is The Same As Cheap
As women, we have a tendency to compare broke men to cheap men and I’m here to say that there is a HUGE difference between the two. Broke men may not have much, but what they do have, they happily share. Cheapskates, on the other hand, have a lot, but are really stingy about sharing it. A broke person’s paycheque is usually a temporary situation, where a cheap person’s attachment to his money is lifelong.
Dating Myth # 4: The Word ‘Nice’ Is Code For Hideous
Generally if you are in your teens or early twenties, hearing the word “nice” about a guy your friend was setting you up with usually meant they were ugly. However, after you get to your late twenties, you will realize that the word ‘Nice’ is usually welcome after the ‘cool’ guys broke your hearts.
Dating Myth #1: Owning More Than One Cat Does Not Mean You Will Die An Old Maid
When we hear some woman has more than one cat, what is the first phrase that generally pops into your heads? “Crazy cat lady” would have been what I would have thought. Sure, there are crazy women that own cats for some reason, however it’s ridiculous to compare mental illness and celibacy with owning multiple cats.
Dating Myth # 2: Women Who Love Sweatpants Need Professional Help
The baggy sweatpants have gotten a bad reputation as of late. Almost every depression commercial depicts the sweatpants as a sure fire sign of mental instability. However, I beg to differ. Just because a woman wants to put on her most comfortable and over-sized sweatpants, does not means he needs to be quarantined and sedated. So behalf of all the sweatpant-wearing lounging single ladies out there, I salute you!
Dating Myth # 3: Poor Is The Same As Cheap
As women, we have a tendency to compare broke men to cheap men and I’m here to say that there is a HUGE difference between the two. Broke men may not have much, but what they do have, they happily share. Cheapskates, on the other hand, have a lot, but are really stingy about sharing it. A broke person’s paycheque is usually a temporary situation, where a cheap person’s attachment to his money is lifelong.
Dating Myth # 4: The Word ‘Nice’ Is Code For Hideous
Generally if you are in your teens or early twenties, hearing the word “nice” about a guy your friend was setting you up with usually meant they were ugly. However, after you get to your late twenties, you will realize that the word ‘Nice’ is usually welcome after the ‘cool’ guys broke your hearts.
Wednesday, 30 September 2015
Lachido Can A Slow Burning Romance Spark A Long Lasting Flame
Not every happy romance starts off with a passionate Hollywood-like beginning. Some relationship back stories are downright dull, while others give pause for thought–which I like to call “The Slow-Burning Romance.”
A slow-burning romance is when one significant other in a content relationship admits that he or she did not fall in love right away with their partner instantaneously, but rather “grew to love” their like-minded partner over some time.
It may lack the kind of intensity that makes for a How I Met Your Mother-like story to tell to your closest friends and relatives, but it definitely beats the nauseating drama of explosive passion that fizzles just as quickly as it sparked up. (A hopeless romantic’s kyrptonite.)
The only problem that comes with a slow-burning romance is that at the beginning it is too difficult to determine whether you’re really “INTO” someone or not. Are you a realist who realizes a life-long partner is not going to be Don Juan Demarco? Or are you simply settling because you’re too afraid of being alone?
So how do you determine if your slow-burning romance will ignite a long-lasting flame or if it simply needs to be blown out?
By asking yourself the following three questions, you will have the love advice you need to make the right decision in your love life:
Dating Tip # 1: Do You Enjoy Your Significant Other’s Company?
Sure, your partner doesn’t make your heart skip a beat, but do you enjoy his or her company when they are around? Can you talk to them openly about your deepest desires and goals in life? Is hanging out with playing video games on a Friday night as fulfilling as a date out on the town? If the answer is yes, you should definitely give your partner a few more dates before making any rash decisions.
Dating Tip # 2: When you received good news, is your significant other the first person you want to share this news with?
Obviously, I don’t need to tell you that this a great sign. It means your partner is on your mind and first on your priority list–whether you love it or not.
Dating Tip # 3: Do you tense up when they want to touch, hug or kiss you?
break-up-blues
If the thought of your significant other touching you makes you flinch or makes you upset, then you should blow out fizzling flame for good while you still can. However, if their embrace makes you feel safe and happy, then give it time. This person may not be your ideal partner, but they may be the long run partner that you need.
Remember that if the attraction is not there, then get out when you can. But also remember, that the one who gets away is always the one you push away.
A slow-burning romance is when one significant other in a content relationship admits that he or she did not fall in love right away with their partner instantaneously, but rather “grew to love” their like-minded partner over some time.
It may lack the kind of intensity that makes for a How I Met Your Mother-like story to tell to your closest friends and relatives, but it definitely beats the nauseating drama of explosive passion that fizzles just as quickly as it sparked up. (A hopeless romantic’s kyrptonite.)
The only problem that comes with a slow-burning romance is that at the beginning it is too difficult to determine whether you’re really “INTO” someone or not. Are you a realist who realizes a life-long partner is not going to be Don Juan Demarco? Or are you simply settling because you’re too afraid of being alone?
So how do you determine if your slow-burning romance will ignite a long-lasting flame or if it simply needs to be blown out?
By asking yourself the following three questions, you will have the love advice you need to make the right decision in your love life:
Dating Tip # 1: Do You Enjoy Your Significant Other’s Company?
Sure, your partner doesn’t make your heart skip a beat, but do you enjoy his or her company when they are around? Can you talk to them openly about your deepest desires and goals in life? Is hanging out with playing video games on a Friday night as fulfilling as a date out on the town? If the answer is yes, you should definitely give your partner a few more dates before making any rash decisions.
Dating Tip # 2: When you received good news, is your significant other the first person you want to share this news with?
Obviously, I don’t need to tell you that this a great sign. It means your partner is on your mind and first on your priority list–whether you love it or not.
Dating Tip # 3: Do you tense up when they want to touch, hug or kiss you?
break-up-blues
If the thought of your significant other touching you makes you flinch or makes you upset, then you should blow out fizzling flame for good while you still can. However, if their embrace makes you feel safe and happy, then give it time. This person may not be your ideal partner, but they may be the long run partner that you need.
Remember that if the attraction is not there, then get out when you can. But also remember, that the one who gets away is always the one you push away.
Friday, 28 August 2015
Lachido Do Fairy Tale Romances Exist?
Do Fairy Tale Romances Exist?
Since we were little, we always assumed that our romanticlives would be as perfect as they are in fairy tales.
One day Prince Charming would come to sweep you off your feet and you would live happily ever after in bliss . Unfortunately, many of us seem to delude ourselves that fairy tales are meant for everybody and more importantly, for the real world.
Dating Tip 1: Have Realistic Expectations On What Makes A Happy Relationship
Unless you have the ability to grow hair that someone can use to climb up a castle, you should keep your expectations far more realistic and avoid comparing your lovelives to the lives from characters out of a The Brothers Grimm tale. Your knight in shining armor shouldn’t be someone who would save you from a burning castle. He should be someone who will cook you dinner after a rough day at work. He should be someone who can carry meaningful conversations with your friends. He should be someone who loves you even when you’re PMSing and who will sit through your favorite groan-inducing reality shows with you.
Dating Tip #2: Be A Damsel In Power
Stop resorting to being a damsel in distress and rather be damsel in power.
A damsel in power is a woman who is supportive and doesn’t have Rapunzel-sized extensions running down her back. She should be someone who can handle being in a room with her boyfriend’s alcoholic father and not even bat an eye. She should be someone who loves her because he’s a good man and not because he makes a good salary they both can live off.
If you’re looking for the optimal romance, remember that you can live happily ever after if you choose to live within your realistic expectations of love. If not, you will find out first hand that some times happy fairy tale endings are for stories that haven’t ended yet.
Since we were little, we always assumed that our romanticlives would be as perfect as they are in fairy tales.
One day Prince Charming would come to sweep you off your feet and you would live happily ever after in bliss . Unfortunately, many of us seem to delude ourselves that fairy tales are meant for everybody and more importantly, for the real world.
Dating Tip 1: Have Realistic Expectations On What Makes A Happy Relationship
Unless you have the ability to grow hair that someone can use to climb up a castle, you should keep your expectations far more realistic and avoid comparing your lovelives to the lives from characters out of a The Brothers Grimm tale. Your knight in shining armor shouldn’t be someone who would save you from a burning castle. He should be someone who will cook you dinner after a rough day at work. He should be someone who can carry meaningful conversations with your friends. He should be someone who loves you even when you’re PMSing and who will sit through your favorite groan-inducing reality shows with you.
Dating Tip #2: Be A Damsel In Power
Stop resorting to being a damsel in distress and rather be damsel in power.
A damsel in power is a woman who is supportive and doesn’t have Rapunzel-sized extensions running down her back. She should be someone who can handle being in a room with her boyfriend’s alcoholic father and not even bat an eye. She should be someone who loves her because he’s a good man and not because he makes a good salary they both can live off.
If you’re looking for the optimal romance, remember that you can live happily ever after if you choose to live within your realistic expectations of love. If not, you will find out first hand that some times happy fairy tale endings are for stories that haven’t ended yet.
Wednesday, 29 July 2015
Lachido Are You Haunted By An Old Love
What is Love? Most of us know what it is NOT. It’s not always on time or in our time. It is not always simple, although sometimes it is. It says one thing and means another and it always disappoints us at one time or another.
So the real question is, why is it that we can’t live without it? Writers write about it. Singers sing about it and if we’re lucky, it is the first impression we have of this world.
Although some of us don’t welcome love into our lives–sometimes others remain haunted by it and are too scared to move on with their lives because they are constantly reminded of their ghosts of ex boyfriend’s/girlfriend’s past.
Dating Tip # 1: Get Rid of Past Mementos
Photos, holiday cards and even that bottle of perfume he bought for you can actually open up old wounds and continue to remind you of negative emotions associated with your ex. Clean out your apartment, car, and office of all mementos and objects you associate with your former partner. If you can’t part with them, give them to a friend who will keep it away for you in storage.
Dating Tip # 2: Release Your Inner Anger
If you are consistently haunted by an ex lover, you most likely have unresolved anger towards them. That’s okay, but if you don’t deal with the residual anger constructively, you can’t let go of your past. The most essential part of exorcising your ex from your mind and your heart is to release the inner demons. Try writing a really honest and angry letter to that person – and then throw it away. Or go to the quietest and isolated location where no one can hear or see you and yell at him or her at the top of your lungs until you’ve said absolutely everything you need to say and have gotten it all off your chest.
Dating Tip # 3: Throw Out Every Mariah Carey Album You Own
From my own personal experience, listening to Mariah Carey’s sappy love ballads towards her exes do not and will not help the healing process of getting over an ex-lover. Almost all of her albums focus on break ups–the same goes for Adele.
Dating Tip # 4: Stop Embracing The “Old You”
Sometimes when we carry old wounds, we behave in the present as if that relationship or situation is still going on. Your current partner may find him or herself in a relationship with “the old you” rather than the improved, evolved person you should be aiming to be. Live in the present, examine your current relationships and situation, and change your behavior to fit the way things actually are right now.
Dating Tip # 5: Seek A Professional Therapist
If you are really feeling distressed, angry, or upset, or if you feel as if the past is preventing you from moving on, I strongly encourage you to enlist the assistance the ultimate exorcist: a relationship counselor or therapist. Another person’s perspective can help you move on with your life so you can live a happy life without being constantly haunted by your past.
So the real question is, why is it that we can’t live without it? Writers write about it. Singers sing about it and if we’re lucky, it is the first impression we have of this world.
Although some of us don’t welcome love into our lives–sometimes others remain haunted by it and are too scared to move on with their lives because they are constantly reminded of their ghosts of ex boyfriend’s/girlfriend’s past.
Dating Tip # 1: Get Rid of Past Mementos
Photos, holiday cards and even that bottle of perfume he bought for you can actually open up old wounds and continue to remind you of negative emotions associated with your ex. Clean out your apartment, car, and office of all mementos and objects you associate with your former partner. If you can’t part with them, give them to a friend who will keep it away for you in storage.
Dating Tip # 2: Release Your Inner Anger
If you are consistently haunted by an ex lover, you most likely have unresolved anger towards them. That’s okay, but if you don’t deal with the residual anger constructively, you can’t let go of your past. The most essential part of exorcising your ex from your mind and your heart is to release the inner demons. Try writing a really honest and angry letter to that person – and then throw it away. Or go to the quietest and isolated location where no one can hear or see you and yell at him or her at the top of your lungs until you’ve said absolutely everything you need to say and have gotten it all off your chest.
Dating Tip # 3: Throw Out Every Mariah Carey Album You Own
From my own personal experience, listening to Mariah Carey’s sappy love ballads towards her exes do not and will not help the healing process of getting over an ex-lover. Almost all of her albums focus on break ups–the same goes for Adele.
Dating Tip # 4: Stop Embracing The “Old You”
Sometimes when we carry old wounds, we behave in the present as if that relationship or situation is still going on. Your current partner may find him or herself in a relationship with “the old you” rather than the improved, evolved person you should be aiming to be. Live in the present, examine your current relationships and situation, and change your behavior to fit the way things actually are right now.
Dating Tip # 5: Seek A Professional Therapist
If you are really feeling distressed, angry, or upset, or if you feel as if the past is preventing you from moving on, I strongly encourage you to enlist the assistance the ultimate exorcist: a relationship counselor or therapist. Another person’s perspective can help you move on with your life so you can live a happy life without being constantly haunted by your past.
Monday, 29 June 2015
Lachido Should You Get Back with an Ex?
Should You Get Back with an Ex
Let’s face it, we’ve all asked ourselves this question at some point in our dating history: ‘Should I get back with him/her?’
It’s a complicated question, and the answer depends on the variables and dynamics of each relationship. Apologies if you came here looking for a definitive answer, because you are not going to get one. What I can give you though, are some tips and thoughts about the situation from a general point of view.
You Can’t ALWAYS Listen to Your Friends
Keep in mind, the only person who knows your situation and the dynamics of your relationship is YOU. Friends and family can give you their opinions till they are blue in the face, and it’s easy to do so when their own feelings aren’t at stake or invested. That is also the problem with friendly advice: the person doesn’t truly know your feelings or what goes on behind closed doors in your relationship. When a friend of mine recently split with her long-term fiance, many of our mutual friends advised her: “You can do better,” “You are better off, he didn’t treat you very well”,”etc etc ad nauseam. I was the only one to sit down and talk to her about her feelings, beyond the typical “Are you okay?” This can also stand as a tip for friends: don’t EVER bash your best friend’s ex! They are now back happy and together, and the naysayers are now frowned upon.
If your friends are expressing concern for your safety and well- being, then you definitely should take heed. But if you get the feeling they are just giving you the typical best friend support by bashing your ex and being there for you, then start taking a look inside at your own feelings, as objectively as possible.
Don’t Put on the Rose-Coloured Glasses.
If you are seriously considering rekindling your relationship, then you need to be as objective as possible about your relationship from it’s beginning straight through to the final day. Don’t start romanticizing your relationship, and remember WHY the breakup happened. This is not to say you should fixate on the negative, because that wont help either, you need to look at the positives and the negatives of your entire relationship period. Looking too much at one side or another will taint your view and possibly push you to make a final decision before you are quite ready. One thing that may help (as cheesy as it may sound) is a Pro/Con list. If you find that you have less than 5 more pros than cons, you should definitely hesitate. The issues you had before will just rehash themselves, and you need to acknowledge and be aware of them if you expect things to work a second time around.
Ask Yourself Why You Think It Will Work This Time Around
You and your ex (hopefully) know and acknowledge the reasons why the relationship ended. But what makes you think it will work if given a second (or third) chance? Have either of you made any significant changes in your lives since you’ve been apart to warrant a review, or has one of you had some sort of drastic revelation about where they may have gone wrong, and are now accepting their share of the blame? If absolutely NOTHING has changed since the split, then you may want to consider why you want them back. Loneliness? Nostalgia? The same problems you had before will still be there for you, its whether you have changed enough to work through them together or not that is the question.
The Odds Aren’t in Your Favor
I don’t mean to be a Debbie Downer, but in relationships where there’s a break followed by a reconciliation, the majority of the reconciliations don’t last. Either the people haven’t changed, haven’t changed enough, or they simply couldn’t work through the problems that caused it to crash and burn in the first place. You can be the exception the the rule, but only if you walk back in knowing the odds are against you, and are BOTH willing to put in the extra effort to make sure things don’t go south again.
Keep in mind also, that sometimes, love just isn’t enough in a relationship. It doesn’t mean that you are destined to be alone, it just means you are destined to find someone who is better suited to you.
Let’s face it, we’ve all asked ourselves this question at some point in our dating history: ‘Should I get back with him/her?’
It’s a complicated question, and the answer depends on the variables and dynamics of each relationship. Apologies if you came here looking for a definitive answer, because you are not going to get one. What I can give you though, are some tips and thoughts about the situation from a general point of view.
You Can’t ALWAYS Listen to Your Friends
Keep in mind, the only person who knows your situation and the dynamics of your relationship is YOU. Friends and family can give you their opinions till they are blue in the face, and it’s easy to do so when their own feelings aren’t at stake or invested. That is also the problem with friendly advice: the person doesn’t truly know your feelings or what goes on behind closed doors in your relationship. When a friend of mine recently split with her long-term fiance, many of our mutual friends advised her: “You can do better,” “You are better off, he didn’t treat you very well”,”etc etc ad nauseam. I was the only one to sit down and talk to her about her feelings, beyond the typical “Are you okay?” This can also stand as a tip for friends: don’t EVER bash your best friend’s ex! They are now back happy and together, and the naysayers are now frowned upon.
If your friends are expressing concern for your safety and well- being, then you definitely should take heed. But if you get the feeling they are just giving you the typical best friend support by bashing your ex and being there for you, then start taking a look inside at your own feelings, as objectively as possible.
Don’t Put on the Rose-Coloured Glasses.
If you are seriously considering rekindling your relationship, then you need to be as objective as possible about your relationship from it’s beginning straight through to the final day. Don’t start romanticizing your relationship, and remember WHY the breakup happened. This is not to say you should fixate on the negative, because that wont help either, you need to look at the positives and the negatives of your entire relationship period. Looking too much at one side or another will taint your view and possibly push you to make a final decision before you are quite ready. One thing that may help (as cheesy as it may sound) is a Pro/Con list. If you find that you have less than 5 more pros than cons, you should definitely hesitate. The issues you had before will just rehash themselves, and you need to acknowledge and be aware of them if you expect things to work a second time around.
Ask Yourself Why You Think It Will Work This Time Around
You and your ex (hopefully) know and acknowledge the reasons why the relationship ended. But what makes you think it will work if given a second (or third) chance? Have either of you made any significant changes in your lives since you’ve been apart to warrant a review, or has one of you had some sort of drastic revelation about where they may have gone wrong, and are now accepting their share of the blame? If absolutely NOTHING has changed since the split, then you may want to consider why you want them back. Loneliness? Nostalgia? The same problems you had before will still be there for you, its whether you have changed enough to work through them together or not that is the question.
The Odds Aren’t in Your Favor
I don’t mean to be a Debbie Downer, but in relationships where there’s a break followed by a reconciliation, the majority of the reconciliations don’t last. Either the people haven’t changed, haven’t changed enough, or they simply couldn’t work through the problems that caused it to crash and burn in the first place. You can be the exception the the rule, but only if you walk back in knowing the odds are against you, and are BOTH willing to put in the extra effort to make sure things don’t go south again.
Keep in mind also, that sometimes, love just isn’t enough in a relationship. It doesn’t mean that you are destined to be alone, it just means you are destined to find someone who is better suited to you.
Friday, 29 May 2015
Lachido Best Kissing Styles Ever
Everyone has a different technique when it comes to their own personal kissing style.
Some people are more reserved with their kissing than others, and some go all out right away.
But which ones are the most successful and most popular? I searched around to find out!
The Teasing Kiss
This type of kiss works especially well in the first stages of a relationship.
Make a couple of initial pecks on the lips, and then on the 3rd or 4th, slightly suck on their bottom lip for a moment.
Then repeat this process, but with their top lip. Keep doing this back and forth for a bit, and it is sure to elicit a sexy reaction from your partner.
The Relaxed Kiss
This is exactly how it sounds, and it’s one of the most popular types because it is intimate and romantic without coming across as too aggressive.
Keeping your jaws relaxed, touch your lips to theirs a few times, and slightly work your lower jaw as you continue kissing.
There’s no forced positioning for your lips in this style, which makes it comfortable, sweet and relaxing.
The French Kiss
This is the most popular kissing style, but it needs to be used in moderation and carefully.
The key is to not be too forceful and come out with a french kiss right out of the starting gate,
because if your opening move is to ram your tongue into the other person’s mouth, you’re gonna have a bad time. Start off slowly with normal,
soft kisses, and slooooowly work your tongue into the action. Don’t start by forcing it into their mouth either,
lick their lips briefly first and you’ll get an idea on how into frenching they are, and can take it from there.
The Aggressive, Passionate Kiss
We all love it once in a while. That kiss where the chemistry between you reaches its breaking point and you ABSOLUTELY MUST KISS THEM NOW.
The kiss begins with force and usually ends with passion, as you gradually relax as the tension slips away.
This kiss usually begins with a brief moment of silence, when you both know exactly what is about to happen and aren’t quite sure how to start off.
Finally you both can’t take any more and connect at the exact same moment in a firm, passionate liplock. It may or may not include tongue, this is optional.
The Tongue Twister
Start out with some romantic, slow kissing on the lips before guiding your tongue into the mix.
Once you feel theirs, twist your tongue in a corkscrew motion around it.
As you come full circle, pull your tongue back and lick towards the tip of their tongue, finishing with a soft peck on the lips.
A sure-fire way to drive anyone wild!
So now that’s you’ve got these top kisses in your mind, why not invite your crush over for a romantic movie night and try them out?
Some people are more reserved with their kissing than others, and some go all out right away.
But which ones are the most successful and most popular? I searched around to find out!
The Teasing Kiss
This type of kiss works especially well in the first stages of a relationship.
Make a couple of initial pecks on the lips, and then on the 3rd or 4th, slightly suck on their bottom lip for a moment.
Then repeat this process, but with their top lip. Keep doing this back and forth for a bit, and it is sure to elicit a sexy reaction from your partner.
The Relaxed Kiss
This is exactly how it sounds, and it’s one of the most popular types because it is intimate and romantic without coming across as too aggressive.
Keeping your jaws relaxed, touch your lips to theirs a few times, and slightly work your lower jaw as you continue kissing.
There’s no forced positioning for your lips in this style, which makes it comfortable, sweet and relaxing.
The French Kiss
This is the most popular kissing style, but it needs to be used in moderation and carefully.
The key is to not be too forceful and come out with a french kiss right out of the starting gate,
because if your opening move is to ram your tongue into the other person’s mouth, you’re gonna have a bad time. Start off slowly with normal,
soft kisses, and slooooowly work your tongue into the action. Don’t start by forcing it into their mouth either,
lick their lips briefly first and you’ll get an idea on how into frenching they are, and can take it from there.
The Aggressive, Passionate Kiss
We all love it once in a while. That kiss where the chemistry between you reaches its breaking point and you ABSOLUTELY MUST KISS THEM NOW.
The kiss begins with force and usually ends with passion, as you gradually relax as the tension slips away.
This kiss usually begins with a brief moment of silence, when you both know exactly what is about to happen and aren’t quite sure how to start off.
Finally you both can’t take any more and connect at the exact same moment in a firm, passionate liplock. It may or may not include tongue, this is optional.
The Tongue Twister
Start out with some romantic, slow kissing on the lips before guiding your tongue into the mix.
Once you feel theirs, twist your tongue in a corkscrew motion around it.
As you come full circle, pull your tongue back and lick towards the tip of their tongue, finishing with a soft peck on the lips.
A sure-fire way to drive anyone wild!
So now that’s you’ve got these top kisses in your mind, why not invite your crush over for a romantic movie night and try them out?
Monday, 27 April 2015
Lachido Why Should I Join?
Lachido Why Should I Join?
Lachido.com is a dating site (you knew that already right?), We care about you having a good experience using this site so you can tell your single friends to join! Do most other dating sites have fully customizable profiles, serious people looking for serious relationships etc? Nope!
What makes Lachido.com different than other dating sites out there? I think we have a lot of great features that are wrapped up in a very easy to use interface. We feel the quality of our product is at least as good as any other dating site (and better than most to be honest). Some of our cool features:
If you’re looking for love, our dating advice guides will give you all the information you need to get started. From first date advice to what men and women are really looking for in a partner, with our help you’ll be able to put your dating nerves behind you and start dating at a pace that’s right for you. And when you’re ready, we offer plenty of date ideas.
Also has all of the other features you would come to expect from a high quality dating site. We really try to keep things simple around here. A lot of sites pack in tons of features but are a pain or confusing to use. Dating is already hard enough we figure. No need to torture people further with a confusing web site.Well if you think this site is cool feel free to join.
Friday, 27 March 2015
Lachido
About Lachido dating
Lachido.com is a dating site (you knew that already right?), We care about you having a good experience using this site so you can tell your single friends to join! Do most other dating sites have fully customizable profiles, serious people looking for serious relationships etc? Nope!
What makes Lachido.com different than other dating sites out there? I think we have a lot of great features that are wrapped up in a very easy to use interface. We feel the quality of our product is at least as good as any other dating site (and better than most to be honest). Some of our cool features:
If you’re looking for love, our dating advice guides will give you all the information you need to get started. From first date advice to what men and women are really looking for in a partner, with our help you’ll be able to put your dating nerves behind you and start dating at a pace that’s right for you. And when you’re ready, we offer plenty of date ideas.
Also has all of the other features you would come to expect from a high quality dating site. We really try to keep things simple around here. A lot of sites pack in tons of features but are a pain or confusing to use. Dating is already hard enough we figure. No need to torture people further with a confusing web site.Well if you think this site is cool feel free to join.
Friday, 27 February 2015
Lachido Dating Myths Debunked
Lachido Dating Myths Debunked
To our great detriment, many single ladies are prone to making cold judgements about good people before we even give them a proper
chance when it comes to our relationships. And for this, I blame outdated old wives’ tales and stereotypes.
In order to have the true dating experience we all crave for, we must shed some light on some common dating myths and why we shouldn’t be living by them.
Dating Myth #1: Owning More Than One Cat Does Not Mean You Will Die An Old Maid
When we hear some woman has more than one cat, what is the first phrase that generally pops into your heads? “Crazy cat lady” would have been what I would have thought. Sure, there are crazy women that own cats for some reason, however it’s ridiculous to compare mental illness and celibacy with owning multiple cats.
Dating Myth # 2: Women Who Love Sweatpants Need Professional Help
The baggy sweatpants have gotten a bad reputation as of late. Almost every depression commercial depicts the sweatpants as a sure fire sign of mental instability. However, I beg to differ. Just because a woman wants to put on her most comfortable and over-sized sweatpants, does not means he needs to be quarantined and sedated. So behalf of all the sweatpant-wearing lounging single ladies out there, I salute you!
Dating Myth # 3: Poor Is The Same As Cheap
As women, we have a tendency to compare broke men to cheap men and I’m here to say that there is a HUGE difference between the two. Broke men may not have much, but what they do have, they happily share. Cheapskates, on the other hand, have a lot, but are really stingy about sharing it. A broke person’s paycheque is usually a temporary situation, where a cheap person’s attachment to his money is lifelong.
Dating Myth # 4: The Word ‘Nice’ Is Code For Hideous
Generally if you are in your teens or early twenties, hearing the word “nice” about a guy your friend was setting you up with usually meant they were ugly. However, after you get to your late twenties, you will realize that the word ‘Nice’ is usually welcome after the ‘cool’ guys broke your hearts.
To our great detriment, many single ladies are prone to making cold judgements about good people before we even give them a proper
chance when it comes to our relationships. And for this, I blame outdated old wives’ tales and stereotypes.
In order to have the true dating experience we all crave for, we must shed some light on some common dating myths and why we shouldn’t be living by them.
Dating Myth #1: Owning More Than One Cat Does Not Mean You Will Die An Old Maid
When we hear some woman has more than one cat, what is the first phrase that generally pops into your heads? “Crazy cat lady” would have been what I would have thought. Sure, there are crazy women that own cats for some reason, however it’s ridiculous to compare mental illness and celibacy with owning multiple cats.
Dating Myth # 2: Women Who Love Sweatpants Need Professional Help
The baggy sweatpants have gotten a bad reputation as of late. Almost every depression commercial depicts the sweatpants as a sure fire sign of mental instability. However, I beg to differ. Just because a woman wants to put on her most comfortable and over-sized sweatpants, does not means he needs to be quarantined and sedated. So behalf of all the sweatpant-wearing lounging single ladies out there, I salute you!
Dating Myth # 3: Poor Is The Same As Cheap
As women, we have a tendency to compare broke men to cheap men and I’m here to say that there is a HUGE difference between the two. Broke men may not have much, but what they do have, they happily share. Cheapskates, on the other hand, have a lot, but are really stingy about sharing it. A broke person’s paycheque is usually a temporary situation, where a cheap person’s attachment to his money is lifelong.
Dating Myth # 4: The Word ‘Nice’ Is Code For Hideous
Generally if you are in your teens or early twenties, hearing the word “nice” about a guy your friend was setting you up with usually meant they were ugly. However, after you get to your late twenties, you will realize that the word ‘Nice’ is usually welcome after the ‘cool’ guys broke your hearts.
Friday, 30 January 2015
Lachido Im Haunted By An Old Love?
Lachido Im Haunted By An Old Love?
What is Love? Most of us know what it is NOT. It’s not always on time or in our time. It is not always simple, although sometimes it is. It says one thing and means another and it always disappoints us at one time or another.
So the real question is, why is it that we can’t live without it? Writers write about it. Singers sing about it and if we’re lucky, it is the first impression we have of this world.
Although some of us don’t welcome love into our lives–sometimes others remain haunted by it and are too scared to move on with their lives because they are constantly reminded of their ghosts of ex boyfriend’s/girlfriend’s past.
Dating Tip # 1: Get Rid of Past Mementos
Photos, holiday cards and even that bottle of perfume he bought for you can actually open up old wounds and continue to remind you of negative emotions associated with your ex. Clean out your apartment, car, and office of all mementos and objects you associate with your former partner. If you can’t part with them, give them to a friend who will keep it away for you in storage.
Dating Tip # 2: Release Your Inner Anger
If you are consistently haunted by an ex lover, you most likely have unresolved anger towards them. That’s okay, but if you don’t deal with the residual anger constructively, you can’t let go of your past. The most essential part of exorcising your ex from your mind and your heart is to release the inner demons. Try writing a really honest and angry letter to that person – and then throw it away. Or go to the quietest and isolated location where no one can hear or see you and yell at him or her at the top of your lungs until you’ve said absolutely everything you need to say and have gotten it all off your chest.
Dating Tip # 3: Throw Out Every Mariah Carey Album You Own
From my own personal experience, listening to Mariah Carey’s sappy love ballads towards her exes do not and will not help the healing process of getting over an ex-lover. Almost all of her albums focus on break ups–the same goes for Adele.
Dating Tip # 4: Stop Embracing The “Old You”
Sometimes when we carry old wounds, we behave in the present as if that relationship or situation is still going on. Your current partner may find him or herself in a relationship with “the old you” rather than the improved, evolved person you should be aiming to be. Live in the present, examine your current relationships and situation, and change your behaviour to fit the way things actually are right now.
Dating Tip # 5: Seek A Professional Therapist
If you are really feeling distressed, angry, or upset, or if you feel as if the past is preventing you from moving on, I strongly encourage you to enlist the assistance the ultimate exorcist: a relationship counsellor or therapist. Another person’s perspective can help you move on with your life so you can live a happy life without being constantly haunted by your past.
What is Love? Most of us know what it is NOT. It’s not always on time or in our time. It is not always simple, although sometimes it is. It says one thing and means another and it always disappoints us at one time or another.
So the real question is, why is it that we can’t live without it? Writers write about it. Singers sing about it and if we’re lucky, it is the first impression we have of this world.
Although some of us don’t welcome love into our lives–sometimes others remain haunted by it and are too scared to move on with their lives because they are constantly reminded of their ghosts of ex boyfriend’s/girlfriend’s past.
Dating Tip # 1: Get Rid of Past Mementos
Photos, holiday cards and even that bottle of perfume he bought for you can actually open up old wounds and continue to remind you of negative emotions associated with your ex. Clean out your apartment, car, and office of all mementos and objects you associate with your former partner. If you can’t part with them, give them to a friend who will keep it away for you in storage.
Dating Tip # 2: Release Your Inner Anger
If you are consistently haunted by an ex lover, you most likely have unresolved anger towards them. That’s okay, but if you don’t deal with the residual anger constructively, you can’t let go of your past. The most essential part of exorcising your ex from your mind and your heart is to release the inner demons. Try writing a really honest and angry letter to that person – and then throw it away. Or go to the quietest and isolated location where no one can hear or see you and yell at him or her at the top of your lungs until you’ve said absolutely everything you need to say and have gotten it all off your chest.
Dating Tip # 3: Throw Out Every Mariah Carey Album You Own
From my own personal experience, listening to Mariah Carey’s sappy love ballads towards her exes do not and will not help the healing process of getting over an ex-lover. Almost all of her albums focus on break ups–the same goes for Adele.
Dating Tip # 4: Stop Embracing The “Old You”
Sometimes when we carry old wounds, we behave in the present as if that relationship or situation is still going on. Your current partner may find him or herself in a relationship with “the old you” rather than the improved, evolved person you should be aiming to be. Live in the present, examine your current relationships and situation, and change your behaviour to fit the way things actually are right now.
Dating Tip # 5: Seek A Professional Therapist
If you are really feeling distressed, angry, or upset, or if you feel as if the past is preventing you from moving on, I strongly encourage you to enlist the assistance the ultimate exorcist: a relationship counsellor or therapist. Another person’s perspective can help you move on with your life so you can live a happy life without being constantly haunted by your past.
Monday, 29 December 2014
Lachido The Pitfalls of a Valentine Day Gift
I can’t tell you how many times I have seen couples fight about Valentine’s Day gifts. What you got, what you didn’t get, what you wanted, what was EXPECTED. And that is the problem right there. Between corporations looking to capitalize, and social pressures, we have come to have certain expectations for our valentines gifts. Allow me to explain…
Valentines day gossip gifts
You have lunch with your girlfriends. Its mid January. The conversation eventually gets around to everyone’s plans for Valentine’s Day. One pal mentions that her and her b/f are going down to Mexico for a week, all inclusive. Which is fine.
Then she casually throws in that it’s his gift to her. Suddenly, almost like a gust of wind, the tone changes. Now each girl at the table with a boyfriend is asking herself the same general thing:
“Why isn’t so-and-so doing something like that for me?” or “I wish so-and-so would do something like that for me…”
Even though logically, they know WHY it wouldn’t be happening. Whether its financial, time off work, or whatever, you know why you boyfriend might not be going that wild for valentines day. Mabye he just doesn’t believe in showing such a ridiculous amount of affection on one specific day and shows you love throughout the year. Either way, you still get that pang of jealousy.
Society is so concerned with status and what other people have, that when we don’t have the same things, we automatically feel pressured to strive for them. Which, in some ways is great. But not when it comes to love. You simply cannot compare your relationship to another one, it won’t work. There’s different situations, dynamics and emotions involved. The sooner you acknowledge and accept this, the healthier your relationship will get.
Valentines day gifts healthy relationship
The only person you have to make happy in a relationship is your partner. When you are planning a gift for them, there’s really only two things to consider:
What THEY want. Yeah you may end up on a weekend getaway that you would not necessarily choose for yourself. But you love you significant other, and really, the holiday isn’t about what you are doing, it’s who you are doing it with. Also, don’t buy them something you would want, or, if you live together, something ‘householdy.’ That’s a trip straight to the doghouse.
Valentines day gifts food and wine
Income/Finances. Ok, so you you know you and your partner would love to go to that food and wine festival 5 hours away. But can your finances take the hit? Especially if the trip involves taking time off work. Could you even afford to take a day off, depending on what the gift was? Consider your income when choosing a gift, don’t put yourself in the poorhouse trying to impress them. You already have them, and if they truly love you, they’ll realize that its the thought that counts.
As a gift receiver, be aware of these things as well, and accept them. As long as your partner puts effort and thought into your gift, that’s all that is important. Keep in mind too that you and your friends may move in different income brackets, so comparison of gifts is a really horrible idea.
At the end of the day, don’t let societal pressures make you feel like you and your sweetheart don’t have good enough Valentine’s plans. No one knows the true story of your relationship but YOU, and as long as you to keep each other happy, one single gift on a corporate cash grab of a holiday won’t change a thing.
Valentines day gossip gifts
You have lunch with your girlfriends. Its mid January. The conversation eventually gets around to everyone’s plans for Valentine’s Day. One pal mentions that her and her b/f are going down to Mexico for a week, all inclusive. Which is fine.
Then she casually throws in that it’s his gift to her. Suddenly, almost like a gust of wind, the tone changes. Now each girl at the table with a boyfriend is asking herself the same general thing:
“Why isn’t so-and-so doing something like that for me?” or “I wish so-and-so would do something like that for me…”
Even though logically, they know WHY it wouldn’t be happening. Whether its financial, time off work, or whatever, you know why you boyfriend might not be going that wild for valentines day. Mabye he just doesn’t believe in showing such a ridiculous amount of affection on one specific day and shows you love throughout the year. Either way, you still get that pang of jealousy.
Society is so concerned with status and what other people have, that when we don’t have the same things, we automatically feel pressured to strive for them. Which, in some ways is great. But not when it comes to love. You simply cannot compare your relationship to another one, it won’t work. There’s different situations, dynamics and emotions involved. The sooner you acknowledge and accept this, the healthier your relationship will get.
Valentines day gifts healthy relationship
The only person you have to make happy in a relationship is your partner. When you are planning a gift for them, there’s really only two things to consider:
What THEY want. Yeah you may end up on a weekend getaway that you would not necessarily choose for yourself. But you love you significant other, and really, the holiday isn’t about what you are doing, it’s who you are doing it with. Also, don’t buy them something you would want, or, if you live together, something ‘householdy.’ That’s a trip straight to the doghouse.
Valentines day gifts food and wine
Income/Finances. Ok, so you you know you and your partner would love to go to that food and wine festival 5 hours away. But can your finances take the hit? Especially if the trip involves taking time off work. Could you even afford to take a day off, depending on what the gift was? Consider your income when choosing a gift, don’t put yourself in the poorhouse trying to impress them. You already have them, and if they truly love you, they’ll realize that its the thought that counts.
As a gift receiver, be aware of these things as well, and accept them. As long as your partner puts effort and thought into your gift, that’s all that is important. Keep in mind too that you and your friends may move in different income brackets, so comparison of gifts is a really horrible idea.
At the end of the day, don’t let societal pressures make you feel like you and your sweetheart don’t have good enough Valentine’s plans. No one knows the true story of your relationship but YOU, and as long as you to keep each other happy, one single gift on a corporate cash grab of a holiday won’t change a thing.
Friday, 28 November 2014
Lachido Fight Fair Without Playing the Blame Game
Admit it, we have all had a fight or two with our partners where we haven’t exactly played fair, whether its by bringing up a past argument, or walking away before the fight has been settled. These kinds of fights can happen, but the problem is when ALL of your fights turn out like this. A relationship should always be 50/50, and when a person starts bringing name calling, or passing the blame off themselves onto the partner, the relationship clearly isn’t equal.
Where does the attitude come from? Usually, it stems from a fear of losing control. The fight could feel so large that they are afraid of where it might end up, and so the best idea at that point, is to blame someone else.The fear and frustration has to get out somehow, and unfortunately, it ends up directed at the people we care the most about. The best thing you can do in that situation is to stop and think: “Is this the person the real reason I am upset right now? What has really caused my bad mood?” If it’s not your partner, maybe you need to leave the room and take some alone time, to prevent a disagreement.
*Did you know: the act of blaming can trigger a burst of adrenalin in your body.*
In today’s society, if we don’t have someone or something to blame, we don’t feel that we can learn or grow. Its like in grade school when they tell you, ‘You have to make mistakes to learn.” This implies that there needs to be a catalyst to learn or improve from. We have been taught this from such a young age, it seems natural as an adult to think that in order to improve your relationship, there needs to be a mistake made. This is totally not true! You do not need any sort of action or situation to occur in order to better yourself! Have you ever read an educational book, just for fun? Have you ever done an activity just because you felt like it, and were surprised that you learned something? The same thing applies to relationships! You can make your relationship better without having a flaw to pick at.
Here are a few basic tips on how to fight fair in an argument:
Take responsibility
Accept that an argument takes two people, and try to understand how you have contributed to the current problem. You may not think that you started it, or even that you’ve done anything wrong, but acknowledging to your partner that you may have exacerbated the fight can help calm both parties down. As long as you don’t say it in a patronizing way, that is. Also, don’t threaten to end the relationship over one fight, or argue just so that you can win the argument. Sometimes, even if you are right, the best course of action is to let the person vent and let the fight die out on its own. Try to be respectful of your partner’s point of view, even if you do not necessarily agree with it. Respect and Responsibility can go a long way to smoothing over even the biggest fights.
Avoid Name Calling
Name calling is the worst and most immature thing you can do when fighting with your partner. Remember, names will never hurt you, but they can make people question your maturity level. Which will lead to the question, “Are they mature enough to handle an adult relationship?” Even using a pet name for your partner sarcastically can be considered immature, so its best to either use their actual name, or dont use one at all.
Dont Talk Down
Talking down to your partner can cause them to feel that you don’t view them as an equal. When you talk down to someone, it implies that you view them as inferior, stupid, or childish. This is not the way you want your relationship to go, so try to avoid using certain tones of voice or vocabulary when fighting. Talking condescendingly and attacking your partner personally won’t solve the current problem, and it makes you look low. Relationships are all about equality, remember?
Leave the past in the past
Arguments from months past still leaving you raw? DON’T bring them up in the heat of another argument. Letting issues pile and pile up until they burst out during a completely unrelated fight are a sure way to cause long-term problems. You are simply adding more fuel to an already growing flame, and it may get to the point where you can’t put it out. It is going to put your partner on the defense, and they will likely come back out swinging with mistakes that YOU have made. You are better off focusing on the issue at hand, and saving any lingering past problems for another time.
Where does the attitude come from? Usually, it stems from a fear of losing control. The fight could feel so large that they are afraid of where it might end up, and so the best idea at that point, is to blame someone else.The fear and frustration has to get out somehow, and unfortunately, it ends up directed at the people we care the most about. The best thing you can do in that situation is to stop and think: “Is this the person the real reason I am upset right now? What has really caused my bad mood?” If it’s not your partner, maybe you need to leave the room and take some alone time, to prevent a disagreement.
*Did you know: the act of blaming can trigger a burst of adrenalin in your body.*
In today’s society, if we don’t have someone or something to blame, we don’t feel that we can learn or grow. Its like in grade school when they tell you, ‘You have to make mistakes to learn.” This implies that there needs to be a catalyst to learn or improve from. We have been taught this from such a young age, it seems natural as an adult to think that in order to improve your relationship, there needs to be a mistake made. This is totally not true! You do not need any sort of action or situation to occur in order to better yourself! Have you ever read an educational book, just for fun? Have you ever done an activity just because you felt like it, and were surprised that you learned something? The same thing applies to relationships! You can make your relationship better without having a flaw to pick at.
Here are a few basic tips on how to fight fair in an argument:
Take responsibility
Accept that an argument takes two people, and try to understand how you have contributed to the current problem. You may not think that you started it, or even that you’ve done anything wrong, but acknowledging to your partner that you may have exacerbated the fight can help calm both parties down. As long as you don’t say it in a patronizing way, that is. Also, don’t threaten to end the relationship over one fight, or argue just so that you can win the argument. Sometimes, even if you are right, the best course of action is to let the person vent and let the fight die out on its own. Try to be respectful of your partner’s point of view, even if you do not necessarily agree with it. Respect and Responsibility can go a long way to smoothing over even the biggest fights.
Avoid Name Calling
Name calling is the worst and most immature thing you can do when fighting with your partner. Remember, names will never hurt you, but they can make people question your maturity level. Which will lead to the question, “Are they mature enough to handle an adult relationship?” Even using a pet name for your partner sarcastically can be considered immature, so its best to either use their actual name, or dont use one at all.
Dont Talk Down
Talking down to your partner can cause them to feel that you don’t view them as an equal. When you talk down to someone, it implies that you view them as inferior, stupid, or childish. This is not the way you want your relationship to go, so try to avoid using certain tones of voice or vocabulary when fighting. Talking condescendingly and attacking your partner personally won’t solve the current problem, and it makes you look low. Relationships are all about equality, remember?
Leave the past in the past
Arguments from months past still leaving you raw? DON’T bring them up in the heat of another argument. Letting issues pile and pile up until they burst out during a completely unrelated fight are a sure way to cause long-term problems. You are simply adding more fuel to an already growing flame, and it may get to the point where you can’t put it out. It is going to put your partner on the defense, and they will likely come back out swinging with mistakes that YOU have made. You are better off focusing on the issue at hand, and saving any lingering past problems for another time.
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